“According to Free Trait Theory, we are born and culturally endowed with certain personality traits—introversion, for example—but we can and do act out of character in the service of “core personal projects.” In other words, introverts are capable of acting like extroverts for the sake of work they consider important, people they love, or anything they value highly. Free Trait Theory explains why an introvert might throw his extroverted wife a surprise party or join the PTA at his daughter’s school. It explains how it’s possible for an extroverted scientist to behave with reserve in her laboratory, for an agreeable person to act hard-nosed during a business negotiation, and for a cantankerous uncle to treat his niece tenderly when he takes her out for ice cream.”
This is from Susan Cain´s book Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking.
Right after I had read that I realized that my family is MY core personal project.
For some it´s the desire to become an expert at her work, for another the desire to run a marathon. For me it´s the desire to do everything that I can to make our family members happy, together and separately.
Passion for this core personal project of mine has become the strongest motivator for myself to grow in life. It is meaningful for me in so many ways.
And “Quiet” is a book that has helped me to understand and accept myself more than any other book so far.
That´s why Quiet is in my TOP 3 books.
My CPP helps me to develop myself. Now, I’m going to use it again as my helper when stepping out of my comfort zone: I´m going to face my fear of putting myself out there. My fear of becoming rejected or embarrassed if I show who I really am.
For too long I´ve felt that there has been a big difference between what I feel I am inside compared to what I´m able to show of myself to the world. I want to get rid of that feeling. I see that in my daughter too. I want to help her to get over her fear of putting herself out there. So that she could show her beautiful personality and uniqueness to the world and feel good when doing so. I DO NOT want fear to limit her life like it has limited mine. How many times my fear has prevented me from opening my mouth and saying what I really want to say? How many times I´ve made myself anxious by letting my fear to rule my behaviour? Way too many!
I want to show to myself, my children and to you that it´s worth to work for to get over your fears and uncertainty. So that your unique personality could shine brighter and it would be easier for you to just be yourself in front of the others. That´s the way to bring wellbeing and happiness, not only for yourself, but also for people around you. And to make it easier for them to just be themselves too.
Our talented local actress Aino Mankonen has promised to help me in the beginning of my journey. I´m grateful for her help and excited about the process, but honestly, also quite terrified. I don´t really know what kind of a journey waits ahead of me…
I have a quite big stage fright. That is actually one reason why you haven´t seen more videos in this blog so far. (The other reason is that my husband simply haven´t had time to put up videos because of his other work). So I´ll use this core personal project of mine to overcome that fear too. I don’t want my stage fright to be a burden for my blog. And I want that you could enjoy more diverse blog content in the future.
If you haven´t yet found your core personal project, keep on looking!
And when you do find it, use the power of it to make your life better.
You may not improve only the quality of your own life, but of all people around you.
I´ve experienced it already and that´s why I´m ready to challenge myself again!
Video about me and Aino in the Savonlinna city theater coming up. Soon. Perhaps. I hope. It’s almost done. 🙂
